You can't stand looking at me? Really?

I had a meeting recently with a potential client and his partner who told me that I made him so uncomfortable, he literally couldn't stand looking at me.  The partners had a Good Cop/Bad Cop thing going -- the one of that was the most verbal, and, I believe was trying to rattle my cage a little, was the Bosco to his partner's Faith (if they were television's Third Watch cops, that is -- I loved that show).

Why was my Boscorelli so nonplussed?

He told me that just looking at my reserved body language and listening to the 'dulcet' tenor of my voice put him ill-at-ease.  I wasn't actually nervous, and when he started drilling me I became instantly curious about his reaction, so I asked him questions about what was going on for him.  The look on both Bosco's AND Faith's faces told me that this was a road less travelled by (Bosco's: shock and disbelief, Faith: a mixture of fear and anticipation).

It was Faith who interjected and shut the meeting down; seemingly out of the blue she announced that we needn't waste one another's time any further -- if there was any doubt in my mind about whether I was going to get an offer ... 

I know it wasn't going to be a good fit, but I also know I would have done some great work for Bosco and Faith.  The problem?  We don't speak the same language.  Yes, Bosco is rough around the edges, but so what? You don't have to like everybody you work with/for. And Faith may be a codependent and less trustworthy ... again, if you know who and what you're dealing with -- keep 'em close by.

The key problem here was that two extroverts met with an introvert, decoded her body language from their own experience: that is, they likely said to themselves, "if I was sitting at the table talking like that/behaving like that, I'd be doubting myself/abilities etc", rather than taking the leap to my perspective (which is what introverts do all the time with extroverts!). 

So if I could figure that out, why couldn't I step it up and super-charge the performance factor?

Because it's difficult to step outside my comfort zone, that's why.  And to do that would have made me nervous.

sigh.

I've joined Toastmaster's International.  More on that anon :-)